just blog how i feel. - about KK

Finally im blogging again :D


sounds so depressing but how can i explain my situation ? how i truly felt ? have i forgotten how to be more authentic already ? i was back in the environment yesterday, it was something suggested by myself with no intention of attending it. *great right* i know ;)
but got busted. :D so Big Guy texted and .. i was there tho i was quite busy w my brothers and on the other side, mom was nagging me to go home ;D it was Jared's birthday - cant blame her cause she told me earlier that she'd be there by 7:30pm and it's already 8pm when i drop by to meet up the group. 


zumba later on. ;) 
sweetypie wants to Join, - that's sweeet baby. ,3 cant wait to see her.
it's Zumba w Big Guy ( brother M ) , yeah' i need to burn some calories. :D
ENERGY PLEASE.


it's been quite a while since i've been out w my friends ;) the so called - hanging out.
used to be with CV-ians alot. the Best Buddy gang who would always invite this little kid around and come to think of it, i guess no one judge me but myself. ;) used to hangout at the rack alot. :D but now ' so seldom - actually is never since last dec? Zun is back now, and we're having some time out tomorrow afternooon. Glad Shan is willing to join us for Tea ;)
after that, might should ' well actually i SHOULD join them to celebrate mama angkat's birthday. Afterall, they invited (remembered) me. so dont be too .. 
Sunday, another Open House that i was invited to. so sorry to Xavier Lee that i didnt attend his open house ;D *so bad ah me* - guess next time i need to show up more.


so much in my mind that im so lazy to think of too many things. ;)
something is not right between myself and my brother kyz. something is just not right anymore - maybe too much things unsaid ? i don't know what should be said/done anymore. letting it be ? ohboyy. what can i say? sometimes, i'm afraid to say anything because when he said something ' it's just too HURTFUL to myself. so better just be quiet and let him be and do what he wants to do. just a very simple hello and byebye would be okay for me as long as dont say those hurtful words. you meant that much to me, but it was so easy for you to say those hurtful words. i did alot to show my care, but it was not enough for you. wanted you to do the right thing in life, wanted you to work but maybe i was wrong also because who can tell someone what to do in life. maybe you will be success in what you are doing now, i guess i could only wish you all the best. but yea, the thoughts of thinking you dont need me, not even need my wish to you does hurts me ;)


huff* i've cared for you like my true brother. before anything aku malar utamakan kamu daripada yang lain. mostly what i did dulu time lepak w you guys are mostly because of you. kerna aku sayangkan kamu, as i always say aku anggap kamu sebagai my brother. kamu paham jua, yang penting kyz pandai pikir* is what i always say. but things now makin different sudah .. we seldom spend time together, always w you because you want to lepak w others saja. i dont know about life, ;) we used to be so far but our heart always close - now we are so close but then our heart become so far. so which is better? i dont want this relationship menjadi macam ini.. but what can i do when it's already happen. 


maybe im not good enough for you, .. so yeah, you said you'd stop hoping from me. does that mean you will also stop caring for me? if yes then it shows clearly that since ive nothing to give, you dont bother anymore. ;) i really hope that in your heart you wont think bad things because that would hurt me more. i rather choose to know nothing about what you think like you always tweet in twitter, but the bad thing about me is i wil go and see it. it's just so hurt, ;) because i saw the way your heart is that you think of me before when we have a bit argue. but do you know why more than 2 years ago, your a person who i would care and keep in contact? because i always always read your blog and saw your heart. you have a Good heart, and that what i like most about you. im just not sure what's happening now. :')


.........................................................................................................


in love w you hidayat :')
it's like 10 more days till our 2nd monthsary ;)
ohlalala ~ 

At the Fruit Garden :D

tomatos 

we went to this place in Taiwan called the Love Bridge.

4 Nights away to Taiwan.

Afternoon world,

it's a few nights more and imma be there. it's not a vacation, it's just work and myself.
i never really fancy going to Taiwan, i guess when you found love the best place in the world is just simply being right beside him, under his arms. <3 that's all. :')


i'll be leaving for 9 days! and im gonna miss him so so much that my heart feels like it's gonna tore apart. as i have this strong feeling that i really dont like vacations without him after returning from Kuala Lumpur for just 3nights apart. 


i'll be officially back by February - that's when you'll be able to see me. But im going to spend the last night of January w my beloved. <3


I'm still thinking deeply about budget wise. i need to be more discipline in how i use my money. i may have extra commitments soon and i need to ensure that, i'm well disciplined. but im well blessed ' thank God so much for that. Thank God that i was able to takecare myself at such age, and they're all from Him <3 


met hermano yesterday ! (;
thankyou for the gift. 'hermano means brother' and indeed his a Great Brother to me tho his way of care is .. quite Ganas but yea he cares so i do appreciate that. that in life, i found few who would truly be there at times when i needed them.
another hermano called me during working hour but i rejected and texted him .. letting him understand that im working at the moment, be avail during at night but he didn't called then. another missing person - Mr.Winter :D hmmm` so far, he became just a passerby in my life because we never really contacted ever since. tho there's this moment where we get quite close together but the universe speaks for itself. :D
thanks for the moments. :D 


Oh Love, Speechless because i couldn't find the exact way to phrase how much i'd be missing you when im away. love you always <3
deep down, it's all about you. (':


                                                    
Moment with My Bestie Zun, her lover boy Ronger, myself and my beloved brother Kyz
at Genting Highland.
                                      


                                    

this was few years back, myself, billy and 3 friends from HongKong.
i used to be (im still) that nosy noisy little kid, when im happy :D
meeting 2 sisters becky and shirley back in year 2010 - they were wu chun fans and if you knew me longer, i used to spend alot of time there and people there are just like family to me - fitnesszone. this 2 sisters went to Mall's Fz and i was there being curious and kepo :D to get closer when i heard them speaking in cantonese i figured i could help in anyway. and i did - eventually we became friends till this very day ! :D they visited last year and brought me alot of things <3 Great peeps ! still waiting to Visit HKG someday for them to bring me around. thanks for being part of my life Becky and Shirley Jie. :D








tho the picture is blurred, but heart knows - it's an amazing night.
28.11.2009 ! ' 






Back to work Soon ! (;
thanks for reading - endless summer


i love you hidayat kms. always truly and deeply!
DiqtaSmers

one more day to go. :D

The DONUTS, nice but the lady ~ oh no' Ganas :P

and the Price ! :D

around BND 1 only. <3

 au makin tabam ~ :D makan makan makan ! :D

 w daddy and mummy :P

 kyz and me @ twin tower - long walk (tired)

 the cute little boy (sam) that we all adores ! so cute :3

the candy store ! (;

after taking picture, i then saw the sign 'no photograph' which i already did.

the view from our apartment -

it was a tiring day ! :D

because we took off at around 8am in the morning and just return back around 9pm! D:

tired much that my foot sore.

we went to Genting highland ! thanks Justin for taking a day off to take us around ! (: appreciated it. it was a long wait for the taxi near our apartment, we waited almost 30mins. brought some breakfast at Seven Eleven (; - went to KL Central and took the Bus to Genting highland. unfortunately the Cable was under maintenance so we had to wait for the Bus. too long, we took the taxi instead, the way up to genting was quite awesome because there's alot of U turns like drifting tracks in initial D ! :D ohlalala ~ Kyz was excited about it, when he sees the fog (:

we didn't played the outdoor games because it was too foggy so most of the rides are closed. it was kinda awesome to actually finally visited genting highland tho we didnt went in to play but i guess it's alright. (: it was FUN and many great moments there as well. (:

we went to ChowKit to buy Lekor :D then off to KLCC - to see the twintower and some window shopping near by where you see those branded goods. :D after that we went back to the apartment ! really tired. :D foot SORES ! and im missing my love badly. :D

all shopping is done, what is left undone.

check the stocks, hair to be done and that's it. 

i cant wait to go back to Brunei ! :D to see him <3 ohlalala ~

truly yours

ruiyee

First Night at KL ! :D

Before Departure -

 Myself, KyzKazuya ( beloved Brother), my love (;

 Miri Departure

 Found her ! Zun - aka Wankuan - my besties since primary 6 ! (;
been talking about meeting her so long already - and now finally - tercapai hajat.

 Where we stays - took us 5 station stops to reach this place from KL CC. (:

 Where we had dinner ! (;

 Oh Cakes - <3

De pastry Chef (;

 oh my lovely cheese cake ! :D GREENTEA <3

 Zun's Order 

 holla to my beloved brother ! @kyzKazuya

 Cool Guy ! - Justin (:

 Myself with one of the Best Dish recommended by the restaurant.

boleh tahan la :D

 It was really amazing, as both Kyz and Justin connect with each other quite well.

Justin has been Great as well, His Very Funny Indeed ! crazy jokes - pacah ! :D

he even said that ' he wont disappoint us, as his gonna bring us around in KL ! :D

 One of the Stall (: - just near the apartment

 the Girls - Zun's friend. orang malaysia ne. malu2 la. (: they all cover up when they see my lens focusing on them :D but they are really friendly to us.. Funny Jokes and talked to us as well.

My old childhood friend since i was in primary 6.

herself and her baby :P two lovely couple, proud of them. (:

tho they just got into a relationship but truly that man loves her for who she is as well. so it's totally awesome ! (: congrats sis.

it was a Great Trip - Thank God that we arrived safely - would love to thank those who prayed for journey mercy, appreciated it. As we reached the airport, we went down and waited for our luggage to come out. it took quite some time - and i find it weird ' because the same thing keep coming out and still  our bags are not out yet. (: - then .. haha, i whispered to kyz and asked him to follow me to the other side .. the truth is we waited at the wrong place. :D our luggage is at the other side :P *funny moment*

we tried to look for DIGI line. but there's NO DIGI line in the airport.

we arrived approx 4+pm, and we walked over and over around here and there looking for Digi Line. 

after asking around, guess it's better to buy at KLCC . so we took the SkyBus which i already booked online - but unfortunately we need to go to the airasia counter to get the itinerary printed to show the SKYBUS service and there we go again :D ~ we left at 6pm. took us almost 2 hour in the airport just to find the things we needed. :D

it took us exactly one hour to reach KL CENTRAL. tried to look for DIGI, long story short we got MAXIS instead. :D- after having malaysia line, i called my friend and asked where's she? :D she told me she's at KL central and i explained that i was at KLIA (shown around) - i asked her to wait as im going to take the train there. in KL there's this machine , like a ATM machine for you to purchase your ticket towards any destination you desire- and there's MAP which you click on (touchscreen) so i figured KLCC ? noo, make sure - i called to make sure where she was again .. and she told me KL CENTRAL - looking at the MAP for KL Central . found it and KL CENTRAL shows that 'YOU ARE HERE' 

rupanya, im actually at KL CENTRAL *lol* so i called her again.. met at McDonalds. :D

took the train and taxi to reach her apartment. :D

had shower - and webcam w my love and his lovely family (: *awesome moment*

thanks <3 -

went for Dinner, late late night OMG.. (:

tomorrow we're hitting the pavillion , time square, sungai wang, pasar malam, then twin tower.

5 destination ! :D ready to rock on ? (: SHOPPING MANIA <3

so many crazy funny moments here and totally cant wait to see my love and share all about it with him !

dear love, thanks for being safe. i love you. (;

heart is for you. ! more to update. aher dah ne *tired* :P 3am now.

hugs

truly yours,

ruiyee