one of the most amazing moment i have <3

A slow day i asked

Lovely day :) No rain at all today and the weather is lovely, tho it does appears to be a bit hot. i stumbled upon an amazing blog and i had it link to my blog (you can search it at "other blogs" page) amazing mother :)

and her blog influenced me to write even more. Its so amazing as the blogger continued her daily post about her family :) and i really enjoyed it. How amazing and simple life can be <3

Facebook appears to be very deserted. No one is really posting at the Group page, i kept refreshing and aww ' its still the same. Where in the world is everyone ? thinking - hmm, oh its Sunday :) a Family day - (hehe)

Where's Gugu ? My team, gugu didnt replied my last inbox, message nor calls. -.- whats wrong with you? message me asap! :)

i actually prayed for a slow day, a very very slow day. My next offday is Thursday because i know im going to be back home late on weds. Irene yap, is leaving soon to melbourne to further her studies and i want to join the next pow wow lunch w her :) and im going to spend the night with all my awesome family too. Weds is like 2 days away, time really passed by when you didnt really noticed it, that is one of the main reason why people kept reminding each other to appreciate the things around and be grateful. but one FUNNY thing is, everyone always Forgets but always remember to remind others. :D

i just had my new DSLR 2 days ago. :) it's a D5100 and i bought it from someone else.

totally loved my new gadget and im trying to make good use of it. so one wish had come true, there's more wishes pending. Im still waiting for my car, people around me had worked very hard and helped me a lot in order for me to get it. Im getting a Brand New Kia Sportage, no specific color yet. But disappointing because it takes so long, and i really wanted to use the Car to pick up my friend at Miri. There's 2 more days to go, seems like its going to take forever. hmm` but either way im still going to enjoy everything :D

If i had a chance, i really want to ask BigFish. Why invest so much in me?

I dont really admire your way mama, please stop being negative. you denied the fact that you cared and you showed it again. -.- Mentor said " your words contains weight, you need take responsibility upon the words you used" - well your not doing it pretty well. It cant be 3 people running, it has to be One Vision, One Mission or else the followers will get lost because there's 3 people in different perspective, vision and mission to be followed. (if you understands)  i dont want to run away, i dont want to escape nor do i want to be irresponsible, you wanted me to grow and improve but you stopped me in a circle and kept shooting me. 

Yesterday was a messed, but thanks to the cheese cake. we felt better, but everyday cant be saved by deli france's cheesecake. there were 3 times when i was going to let go of my emotions and allow them to flow. But i didnt, cause i refused to appear weak. People definitely asked me to take it easy, well.. it doesnt look like a BIG DEAL to you, because you didnt understood how much it had hurt me. Cant say too much, because when i started to talk - its going to be wrong. And if i kept it inside, they would had taught that im not sharing. 

But throughout every event, atleast i get to learn more insight in life. :)

Yesterday, my desire re burned. I want to do what i always had visioned out in life. 

to be updated. much love.

rui

crazy day

My day started out crazily, i almost fall. They can be really upset and start shooting around and the story are normally the same. ;0 was such a crazy day this morning, when the company called me again and told me that what i simply requested was too much for them but they insisted me to do what they asked for tho its extra works. -.- im like "wooahhhh, thats abit too much !" Moreover when people were upset about the flight destruction and start shooting at me. im like " keep apologizing to them " ` i did my best .
But it was a bit too much, all the problems kept rushing in split second. And YES, i almost broke into tears for 3 times this morning.


in the end, i walked away and calm myself down. Kakao talk w my gang and wow :D i felt better :)
Stay strong bitch! is what i would say. we still have to SMILE :)

this boy, his name is ad musa aka David. 

and his the Bitch :)

Thanks to our mama, :) she belanja us cheese cake so all the crazy day actually is totally worth it <3

oh kids <3

well, ad and i was invited for dinner :) at Orchid Garden Hotel.

The OGH's awesome guys

From the right ; kyden, Ad, Summer, Jay, Chai Yi and our mom :)

Ad and his wifey

The one and only ME <3

i love myself, and so should you !
may tomorrow be an awesome day. <3

Love my God,rui

awesome day eys

One down, one more to go :) everything was well planned, thank God actually caused He made this all happened. think this kid can get so much in such a short time? wisdom and blessings was sent from above. :)

i was doing a private tour this afternoon and it turned out GREAT ! i never felt that awesome doing a BS tour :D and there's a part of me wanted to just text him and tell him the great job i did but what stopped me?  Im a person who likes to have FUN , like loads of Fun and i know how to take care of myself, i DO :) but taking care of a team who find themselves hard to follow me - oops` here comes the problem. i wanted to RUN, going really in fast phase but they're not running. Yes, something is slowing me down and when im slowed down, my aware ness is not switch ON. thats when i messed up ( just like when i drive, i find it really hard to drive slow)- true story! :D

i find him, like a daddy :D <3

aww, thats like so nice :D 2 big brother treating me a cup of hot chocolate. yums

Yeayeayea, listen to all you want. If a person can just say a word and change your whole perspective and trust towards me, then ....

being grateful, thanks auntie for the help :)

and tonight, i got a very awesome gift for myself. something that i've been longing for years :D now had finally reached my tiny palms <3 

met a guy whom surprised me alot, its nice to see someone who cares so much for their family :) i was like " wow," in my mind i couldnt really expect that someone like this really existed around such environment.

daddy, i long for such care from you. :) time is running fast, i hope its never too late. :D

will Big Fish get dissapointed about this? well, its my choice :D

just love me for who i am, cause theres no one else like me <3

" Perhaps, i'm afraid of changes " - ruismers

lost?

I can be very forgetful, i can forget all the promises i once made, i forgot most of the things that had keep me running - question why ? "i still dont know"


Yesterday, i was having Fun - not being serious ( unleashing yellow ) and He shot them away and took me into a serious conversation. asking myself deeply " what does that mean ?
So, i went back home - i wasnt feeling too well, and i tried asking myself ' and i found some things but i still somehow feel lost.
i forgotten what Big Fish told me :( where were i ? 
i was trying hard to be present, but why have i forgotten the feelings and the meaning of conversation that i was having.


so, im not using my tools? isit a waste? :(


i took some time , asking about myself. but so far, it's little that i found. Big Fish, has been very connected i just hope and prayed that i can get back on fast track in no time because i dont wanna get anyone dissapointed.


Lord, get me back on track :)
show me the way please, my AT is reacting alot. :(

"you didnt ask yourself deep enough"